The Gamble Life

Great Day at the Butterfly House

We were at the Butterfly House and the Museum of Life and Science on a warm day and it was one of those lucky days when we find a butterfly who is new, dying, or "friendly."

I even caught a copycat shot of the picture I took two years ago!

What a difference two years makes!  Same kid, same personality, but so different at the same time.

Obviously we take birthday celebrations pretty seriously, but I have been wanting to do something more meaningful to mark the boys' birthdays, especially Gus since he is older.  Or maybe to mark some of them more.  I remember when I turned sixteen and my dad took me out to a fancy hotel lobby for a drink (I did not have an alcoholic drink, just a regular drink, but the atmosphere was fancy) and gave me my first fountain pen.  It was really great and I felt very grown up.  Maybe it's too soon for this kind of thing, but I do want to think about it for the future.  What do you do to mark birthdays?

Black Friday?

So I guess a lot of folks hit the stores pretty hard on Friday...we actually didn't go into a single store!  I don't  have anything against it; it can be really fun to shop when a lot of other people are also out and there are sales and specials, but we so rarely have Chris at home all day on a weekday that I didn't want to waste it. And I had arranged a morning playdate for Gus that Abe and I were also included.

If you haven't finished all your shopping, you might be able to score a really great toy for one of your little ones right here on this blog!  That's right, I decided to accept one of the offers I received, to host a give-away and a review.  I normally pass, but they let me pick the toy and I found one that looks really great so I decided to accept.

To be honest, I had never heard of All Modern Baby before, I think because it is actually part of a large conglomeration of online "stores" (including one devoted just to Christmas decorations!).  They have some nice stuff though.

So check back, I'll post a review soon with details on the give-away.

An Oops by the National Wildlife Federation/Ranger Rick

Let me just say first that Gus continues to adore his Ranger Rick magazines and it is always a huge treat when one shows up in the mail.  They are fun, funny (lots of jokes and riddles) and do a great job educating about the environment in an age-appropriate way.

Why did they mail my son a plastic (some kind of poly-nylon) backpack in a plastic envelope then?!  No idea--they did it to be nice, but we weren't expecting it and would subscribe regardless (did, in fact).  So, I wish they hadn't.  He'll probably use the backpack for something, but it won't last forever and the envelope is not really reusable either.  Oh well--I think it just goes to prove once again that plastic is so ubiquitous it is almost invisible, unless you really make an effort to open your eyes to it.

Before and After

 

Turning Six

Gus turned six this October, but first, I found these bowls at a thrift store for only 75 cents each!  They are the perfect size and shape for Abe to have soup or yogurt, and they are also becoming my favorite bowls for salsa.  I love them!

I can barely believe that I haven't posted about Gus' amazing birthday party at my mom's house (he also had a birthday party here in Durham that was pretty fun too).  It was pirate themed and as usual she went all out!  This is just the cake!

She sewed Gus a pirate costume which he wore at the party.  We also gave all the kids pirate bandannas, tattoos, good hoop earrings, and the option for mustaches.  They all got dressed up as they came in but kept the costumes on to varying degrees.

Gus loved it though and kept his entire costume on the whole time.  I made a buried treasure scavenger hunt for the goody bags (which were treasure chests filled with pencils, stickers, a parrot cookie, pirate erasers) and this is Captain Gus reading one of the clues.

They had so much fun that I think we should do a hunt at every party, regardless of theme.

Abe enjoying his cake right on the floor.  The cake was a huge hit.  It was so elaborate that I got to ask each child "which part do you want?" and they could say "the ocean" "the sand" or whatever.  It was really fun.

Gus' party in Durham was at the bowling alley and I didn't take any pictures, but the kids had a fantastic time.  I made a cake too, although nothing as impressive as the pirate cake, I still thought I did a pretty good job.  The bowling alley staff was very impressed.  Gus decided where the candles and the little balloon and swirly candies went.

Of course I couldn't just give the bowling alley goody bags away...so I made these little fabric bags and filled them with pencils & stickers and snickers bars!  I thought they came out so cute.  The bags I bought at Michaels, in packs of 5 for $5 and then I used Wonder Under to iron the applique to the bags.  I did not sew around them because it would have taken forever, so eventually they'll most likely peel off, bu the bag will still be good.

Turning six is about a lot more than just parties and cakes and presents.  Gus really does seem (most of the time) so much more grown up than he used to.  One of the things we do at a birthday is add a new responsibility and a new privilege.  This year, Gus and I talked it over and decided his new responsibility is to clean out and put away all the items in his lunch bag every day and to clear his place at the table (including picking all the food he drops everywhere) and put everything in the dishwasher or the sink as appropriate.  So far he is doing a good job.  I still have to remind him most days, and in fact, I have a sneaking suspicion that he forgot to do his lunch box tonight which means that he'll have to hand wash his thermos and glass tomorrow morning since it won't have gone through the dishwasher.  But on the whole he does it all and without complaining, so that is nice.

The new privilege has been really hard to settle on.  First we said it would be going to see a movie occasionally, but honestly, he is not that interested in going to see a movie.  And, it requires that I go and watch it first (unless we get a dvd, then I can just watch it in advance at home) because the kids movies I see don't strike me as appropriate for kids!  We (Chris and I) just watched Up last night and it was not appropriate for a six year old in my opinion.  It was far too sad, too mean, and too violent.  I would love to have his new privilege be going places, like across the street to the field by the water easement, alone when he wants to but I'm anxious about that.  So we tentatively settled on the movies, but we haven't gone to one yet so I'm still trying to think of something better.  If you've got a good idea for me let me know.

Gus is a really great kid--loving, goofy, stubborn, smart, silly, sensitive, frustrating, and adorable.  I am so incredibly lucky to be his mom.

Gus & Sports

Saturday was Gus' last soccer game of the season.  This was his first time playing soccer and from my perspective he found it somewhat difficult to get into the groove of it.  Part of it was just that he really didn't know the rules of the game, hadn't seen anyone else playing the game (except for recess soccer, not really the same thing), and obviously hadn't played himself.  And, as it turns out, we joined a team that the majority of the members had been together for two years already. 

His coaches were great though--very encouraging and they did not emphasize winning, which is good because they maybe, maybe won one game, but I'm pretty sure they didn't actually win any.

Frustrating for me was that Gus would so often not pay any attention to the game at all.  He would beg to be goalie and then spend his time facing away from the field fiddling with the ties that keep the net on the frame.  It was a lesson for me to not yell at him, but just to remind him before hand to pay attention and then let him learn, or not, on his own.

At the last game though, he did have some good plays including this save:

Of course later in the same game he managed to get his foot completely tangled in the net (not while saving a ball or anything, just because he was sticking his feet through the net) and needed help getting free from his coach.

I've also struggled because this team has it's share of boys (and yes, it's only the boys on the team doing this, not the girls) telling other kids they aren't good or knocking other kids over or otherwise doing things that are mean or verge on mean.  Gus was definitely on the receiving end of some of this, but it's so hard to tell from a distance whether he was on both ends, whether the kids were having fun pushing or what.  At least one time Gus was really upset and couldn't get a little boy to stop bothering him so I had to go and talk to Gus about what he could do, and tell the other boy to cut it out.

But whenever I asked Gus always said he enjoying soccer, he wants to play again in the spring, and he likes the kids (mostly).  He always took off from the car, leaving me and Abe to trail behind him, and ran all the way to practice or a game; he always wanted to go.

An interesting thing happened that helps me relax about his playing sports.  It happened after the last game, when the kids were gathered prior to the trophy ceremony.  All the kids were yelling about how many different trophies they have at home and Gus was just looking around and quiet.  My first thought was that he was feeling bad because he only has one trophy at home (from T-Ball), but almost at exactly the same time that I thought that he broke out in a big grin and yelled "I have one trophy!  This is my second!" and it occurred to me that rather than feeling inadequate, left out, or bad, maybe he was just figuring out how he was supposed to be behaving.  And then, when he figured out what all the kids were doing, he joined right in, really happy and confident.

That I think, is what I am most glad he is getting from being on these teams.  It's a completely different experience for him than school is (especially since he attends a Montessori school), completely different than a playdate, or the friends he's had his whole life in Austin.  It's rougher and causes me more worry, but it's giving him a chance to experience social mores he is unfamiliar with and figure them out and decide for himself if he wants to participate in them.  And I do believe he is exercising judgment because he also told me, after a run-in with a bigger boy, "Those big boys are all the same, they always ask you how old you are first.  They think being older makes them special.  They are crazy."

Of course, if he learns to love organized sports I think that will be a big plus too.

Scenes From Childhood

Playing in the rain:

Discovering nature:

Relaxing without a care in the world:

Throwing yourself into playing:

Not pictured, but evidence currently exists in my house:  coloring on the walls and enough Halloween candy to go into sugar shock several times over. 

If there are some kids in your life I hope you and they are enjoying the joyousness of childhood.  We are around here!

Happy Birthday to Me!

Actually, my birthday was Sunday.  I turned 40 which is startling but obviously a positive thing.  I think it is an unwritten blogger rule that when you have a birthday you make a list of the things you are going to do that year, matching it to your age, so I should come up with 40 things to do.  I could come up with a list of 40 books I'll read!  I actually tried but the list was just turning into the same old list (get in shape, clean the house every week, make a quilt, go on more walks, etc. etc.), not exactly scintillating to read about or to write about.  And not exactly what turning 40 makes me think about or feel either.

So instead I've come up with four lessons (one for each decade of my life) that I want to keep more aware of as I go about my daily life.

Age 0-10:  When In Doubt, Include Everyone 

I think all kids go through times when they relish hurting another kid's feelings, and probably times when they are the kid with the hurt feelings.  This is actually a lesson I've continued to learn (from both sides, I'm sorry to say) over the decades since I turned 10.  Of course you can't be best friends with everyone you meet, or always invite all your neighbors over for dinner because you want to invite one of them.  But there is no reason to have a party and invite all your neighbors except the one you don't know very well or think you don't like very much.  The majority of the time when I go ahead and include the whole group I've been very happy with the outcome.  There is something (sad to say, but true) that feels good about knowing there is a person out there who wants to be included and you hold the power to exclude them.  But there is something that feels even better about including them.  I am going to remember to include the people around me.

Age 11-20:  Enjoy Yourself

God, what amazing wonderful years these are!  I had so much fun.  I even loved Junior High.  I am lucky in that I don't really get embarrassed by a lot of things.  I've always thought that if you do the silly thing or show that you aren't perfect, people relax around you and like you more.  They turn off their internal judge and quit worrying that you are going to judge them.

High school and college are the years I said "yes."  Yes, let's go to that party where we only know one person.  Yes, I'll try out for the soccer team even though I've never played before.  Yes, I'm going to be a rower even though I'm short (for a rower) and don't even like water that much (best decision of college, by the way).  Yes, I'll take that incredibly hard science class and see what happens, just because I'm interested in it.

As we get older we feel we have more to lose and start saying yes less often, which ends up causing us to lose out.  So I am going to say "yes" to the little adventures and interests that pass my way.

Age 21-30:  Work Hard

Going to law school, starting my career, being independent and responsible, running a marathon.  These were wonderful years.  I learned how hard I could work, how capable and smart I am, how strong I am.  I gained confidence with every challenge that I met and at least tried to conquer. 

I am going to remember that hard work brings big rewards.  I am going to tackle the things I want to tackle, find time for them, and expect myself to do an excellent job.  My life now may revolve largely around the needs of others but that is not an excuse to skip the things that make me feel like me.

Age 31-40:  Assume The Best About Others

So many things in the past year have reminded me that first impressions can be wrong, that most people are trying hard, that we all deserve second chances and the benefit of the doubt.  Becoming a mother is like entering a crazy world of judging, judging, judging.  You judge yourself, you judge your friends, you judge strangers and you imagine that they are judging you.  Ugh.  But every time I stop the judging, take people for who they are, assume less and ask more, I learn good things.

Moving across the country has also reminded me that you don't know someone until you've known them for a long, long time.  It takes more than a year to become good friends with someone.  If you decide too soon that they aren't for you, well, you might miss out on your new best friend.

Even some person driving like a bozo might have a good reason.  And if they don't has it hurt you to assume that they do?  Nope, it's probably kept your blood pressure down which is good for you!  So this year I am going to assume the best, stay patient, and wait to learn more.

So Happy Birthday to me!  I had a fabulous day that my three guys gave me, from start to finish, and I feel so very, very lucky to be here, to be 40, and to have my wonderful life.

new bibs

Take an old towel, some fun fabric, some seam binding...(I absolutely love these make-your-own-seam-binding tools by the way; they are so easy and useful).

Some straight-forward sewing.

And one reversible, large, absorbent bib is created!

Tuesdays are tomato soup and grilled cheese days for lunch and Abe is definitely in need of a really good bib so I decided to make some of my own.  This is a great way to use up scraps of fabric and give old towels a new life.